Today's green patch is tommorrows barren land

What looks like a greener pasture to you today might turn out to be a piece of barren land when you stand on it tomorrow!

Seriously, human desires, wishes, dreams, aspirations have no boundaries, and can never be fulfilled. I remember how happy I was when my dad bought me a purple shaded ladybird cycle, when I was in my 9th std. The happiness sustained just for two years, as when in college I wished to ride an Activa and not a ladybird. My dad bought me a bike, when I was in college and I dreamt of driving a car. Today I am driving a car, hoping to drive a luxurious one some day. I am sure that when that day comes, when I will be driving a posh SUV on Indian roads, I would be cursing the day I learnt to drive and hire a driver to ferry me around.

The grass always looks greener on the other side!
When you step on that green patch, you see greenery somewhere else, and just barren land under your foot.

I was a crime reporter, till about two months back. Although I enjoyed my job, I always envied those who were into a 9 to 5 job and had weekends off. While they spent their weekends relaxing I used to work 24 hrs a day, whether I was physically present in office or not.I was jealous, because, although I used to work for longer hours I was being paid in pittance. I was jealous, I was angry, I was frustrated....

I ended my career in journalism to move into a more secured job. Today, even I work from 9 to 5 and have the entire weekends to myself. But I am still not happy. The expressions from anger, jealous, frustration have changed to boredom, lack of satisfaction, a feeling of being unproductive...

Today I look back and when I compare myself from a crime reporter to an editorial head of a mechanical publication I realise this land of boredom was my lush green pasture few months back.

Probably its the initial stage feeling. I have sown some seeds of happiness and with time I shall also reap some green patches on this barren land..... Hopefully :)

Crime reporting was my first love and that will always be cherished. But time to move on...

ends///

Celebrating Womenhood..... Or are we?

100 years of women and womanhood was celebrated on 8 March 2011. Every store had special offers for the women, events dedicated to the better sex on TV, radio and print. Suddenly every person, a stalker, a rapist, a khaki clad, a concerned father, a loving brother and just another person.... all seemed to have dedicated their day to the women in their life and also those not in their life.

Being a crime reporter and specifically a lady crime reporter, I did not celebrate the womanhood. Obviously because i did not find one good reason to do so. After seeing crime with extreme close proximity, its hard to believe that women hood is actually celebrated.

I meet a cop : the one who is supposed make people feel secure. But surprisingly i feel insecure with the dirty stare i get in return. I visit a court and see the black and white clad lawyers stalking at me. Just like the crows on your roof top when you are trying to drop something out. I visit my office, i see my senior a boob starer making you feel uncomfortable despite covering every part of your skin. On Women's day i saw NO difference.

When women talk for their rights, men argue and at the end of their conversation they term you a feminist. A man argues and when comes close to his defeat, he hits your week spot. If he still loses, then the girl's image is tarnished big time. Men talk about equality, but they are certainly the ones who cant digest women's growth.

A father rapes his daughter, a husband hacks wife's id to keep a check on her, a senior officer seeks sexual favours in reputed Institution, failing which a peon is made to head a post graduate. It happens till date and hopefully not further.

I am sure to hurt many sentiments of people whom I know, who belong to the stronger sex. No matter how liberated they are in their thinking, the stigma still prevails. I say with no exceptions... only hoping that there are exceptions.

Stone heart.... Am I ???

Someone called me stone hearted today!

Although i dont like this person, a lawyer who just tries to grab an oppurtunity to shake hands with me and stand next to me, he called me i am stone hearted. The reason being that i had refused to receive his calls, for obvious reasons. But his words still echo in my head as i really think if I have become stone hearted.

Every job has its good and the ugly side. Being a crime reporter i have faced more of the ugly side than the beatiful one. Surving your day hoping some crime happens on that day so that i could meet my deadlines and file something for the day. I think I have become stone hearted.

Been in the profession and seriously being in the profession, i really think i have become a lesser human. Death has become a routine, and my day doesnt end without suicide, murder, rape or the likes.

Although i knew about this creeping in, I could ignore unless people started pointing out inhumanity in me... Time to move on with no regrets and turn more humane...